New Beginnings...

January 5th 2010

NEW BEGINNING’S

So, it is a new year and new beginning’s are usually accompanied by a new year. I have had quite a year ,I have learned many amazing things about myself and my heart.. But the most important lesson I have learned ,the one lesson that I will carry with me forever….Is that love always finds a way ,even when its impossible and unpredictable, it makes its way to where it was meant to be even if the odds are totally against it…
The reason I know this is because last year is the year I had basically given up on love.. True love anyway and then I met a girl, a pretty, funny sweet but straight girl( if there is such a thing) had a fling or thing but definitely found myself because of this unpredictable girl.
I wrote a book about the girl and the many crazy reasons why we didn’t work out.
The reason I wrote the book was because I didn’t get the girl but because of what happened with her I found my true love and was ready for my life to really begin. I never new what it felt like to truly love with all of my heart and soul,until Brandy.She made me see myself and realize who I am, what I want and what I don’t want.
Another thing she woke up inside me was that sexual and passionate side of me that only seemed to come out when there was alcohol involved.
Do you believe in coincidence, faith or hope? They are all so different but similar or do you believe in Destiny. I think I believe that we all have a destiny and we have all the answers in our hearts and usually don’t listen to them. Maybe we don’t listen because we have been programmed to ignore our hearts and follow society's idea of whats good for us.
Do we do everything in the right time for the right reasons? Is the universe pointing us and showing us our true place and purpose? I think so…
Let me tell you why… So I fell for a girl who didn’t fall for me and because of the situation and the circumstances, I met the right girl, my dream girl, my spiritual partner in every aspect..
This is a quick version of true destiny,A girl walks in to the bar,now that's funny coming from a bartender (I know it sounds like a cliché..)with her husband, now that’s the crazy part. Right away I know there was something about her that seemed familiar. They stay ,we talk ,they leave and come back a week later. When she walks in the second time, I can’t do anything but smile because she has this smile that reaches down into your heart and touches it..that’s the only way I can describe it.
So her and her husband start to come by every week and they have dinner a couple of drinks. I catch her up on my drama with the girl that got away. Or whatever girls I am talking to at the time. I tell her where I am at with my book and what I am looking for.
The whole time thinking ,God I wish she wasn’t married, I know, I know, its horrible. I couldn’t help it though, I wanted to be with her ,to know her, to laugh with her, talk to her, kiss her ,touch her ,to love her but I kept telling myself she’s married…
Then finally ,oh that’s right I almost forgot, we did kiss, one night. She was a little bit intoxicated and I take total responsibility for that, only because I didn’t know she was a light weight. A beautiful light weight but still a light weight. I went to hug her and she kissed me, let me tell you , I wouldn’t give that kiss back even if she wanted it. She is a really good kisser..from that moment that she kissed me ,I was whipped..How does that happen? Now what?
To be continued…….